To those who want to know what ghosting is – it the practice of ending a personal relationship with someone by suddenly and without explanation withdrawing from all communication.
I had startled her. When she saw me, she didn’t know how to react. Her eyes were on me fixed, placid. I stood there waiting for her cue. She nodded her and I pulled the chair to sit opposite to her, across the table in the quaint coffee shop.
“How are you?” I began
She nodded again. I sat there. Neither of us spoke for a long time. I sat there opposite to her in silence occasionally glancing at her, wondering what was going on in her head. She had closed the book that she was reading – Brida. I learned to be emotionally distant from everyone, especially her. Now sitting here, my resolve was weakening. I noticed her. She was calm, or maybe distant. The silence was making me uneasy. After sometime she idly asked me,
“Why are you here?”
“I wanted to talk to you” I lied
“Guilt” she responded.
She was neither angry nor upset or distant. She was completely in that moment. As beautiful as it seemed, it was terrifying.
“I should not have ghosted you” I confessed leaning forward as if drawn to the light.
“Someone ghosted you too?” she asked the obvious. I was glad, finally a conversation.
“I’m sorry. I should have at least bid a proper goodbye” I had a lump in my throat.
She held her composure, it seemed to come to her naturally. “I had imagined this moment so many times in my head. In every scenario, I walk away in a huff, or I’ve cried or made a dramatic exit. Now though” she just shrugged, reached over to me and she hugged me. As she did, she whispered, “You are hurting. It is hard, It is difficult. I cannot imagine what you would be going through. Being ghosted can be devastating”
She broke the embrace only when I let her go. I felt lighter. A thought fluttered, maybe I have back on my side. As quick as the thought came, realization blew it away. She was not dramatic because she was no longer reacting. She had forgiven me even when I didn’t apologize to her, she was at peace with herself. She was being compassionate but not vulnerable. She wore kindness as an armor, perhaps the most indestructible of them all. Then I did something that I should have done long ago – I bid her goodbye and walked away.
<One more thought below>
Now that you have read it once. Who did you think the narrator was? A guy or a girl? Did you imagine them to be old lovers, or friends, or anything else?
Re-read it again now with the change in the character, if you thought it was her boyfriend, now imagine the narrator to be her girlfriend and vice versa; or if you thought they were soulmates, reverse the thought and revisit the scene again. Don’t forget to share your thoughts.